Learning to Speak Kindly to Yourself
Have you ever looked in the mirror and immediately found something wrong? You noticed another wrinkle, another gray hair, something that isn’t quite where it used to be — and apparently gravity has been working overtime. Learning to speak kindly to yourself starts right there, in that moment, when you choose what to say to the woman staring back at you.
We laugh about getting older. We joke about it with our friends. We share the memes. But can I be honest with you for a second, sweet friend?
Sometimes you’re terribly hard on her.
The Woman in the Mirror Deserves Your Kindness When You Speak Kindly to Yourself
So today, I want you to try something different. The next time you’re standing in front of that mirror, don’t look for what’s wrong.
Look at her. Really look.
Those eyes? They’ve cried tears nobody knows about. Tears you wiped away before anyone could see. Tears you shed in the middle of the night when nobody was watching.
Those hands? They’ve held the people you love through their hardest days. They’ve wiped little faces, held trembling fingers, and carried more than their share.
That face? It’s laughed until it hurt — the kind of deep, belly laughing where you can’t catch your breath and your cheeks ache and you wouldn’t trade that moment for anything in this world.
That body? It has carried you through every single day of your life. Every. Single. One.
She Has Been Through More Than Anyone Knows — Speak Kindly to Yourself
Think about everything that woman has walked through.
She’s been hurt — deeply, in ways she doesn’t talk about. She’s healed — slowly, quietly, one day at a time. She’s made mistakes she wishes she could take back. She’s started over when she didn’t think she had the strength to.
She’s been knocked down. She’s gotten back up.
And sweet friend — she’s still here.
Still breathing. Still trying. Still showing up.
That right there? That’s not weakness. That’s a warrior.
What If You Thanked Her Instead? Learning to Speak Kindly to Yourself Changes Everything
So maybe today, instead of picking her apart — instead of pointing out every flaw and every year that shows — you could just thank her.
Thank her for not giving up.
Thank her for getting out of bed on the days she didn’t want to.
Thank her for loving people even when they didn’t love her back.
Thank her for being brave when she felt anything but brave.
Because here’s the truth that changes everything when you learn to speak kindly to yourself — God didn’t make a mistake when He made you.
Not one.
He formed you with purpose. He designed every detail. And He looked at you and called you wonderful.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” — Psalm 139:14
You are not an accident. You are not “less than.” You are not what the mirror tries to tell you on a hard day.
You are His masterpiece.
Notice the Life — Not Just the Years — When You Speak Kindly to Yourself
The next time you look in that mirror, I hope you see something different.
Not just the wrinkles — but the years of smiling that put them there.
Not just the gray hair — but the wisdom that came with every single strand.
Not just a body that’s changed — but a body that carried you through a beautiful, messy, God-given life.
“Growing older isn’t losing your beauty. It’s collecting evidence that you got to live.”
Every line tells a story. Every mark is proof that you showed up and you kept going.
And that, sweet friend, is not something to criticize.
That’s something to celebrate.
So today — just today — will you be a little kinder to the woman in the mirror? Will you look at her and say, “Thank you. I see you. And you are enough”?
She’s been waiting to hear it from you for a long time. 💛
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With love and faith,
Marilyn 💜